Langley Falls plans to build a huge football stadium. Stan learns that the construction will require an old tree to be torn down—a tree Stan claims is his father. To save it, Stan must face off against Roger, who stands to make a fortune by paving the stadium’s massive parking lot.
In his continuing quest to touch a boob, Steve decides to try to earn a letter jacket by joining the school’s water polo team. When his initial attempt fails, he enlists Klaus’ help to make the squad, and soon becomes the team’s star player. Meanwhile, Stan and Roger buy a sailboat and become “boat guys,” but soon discover it’s not as glamorous as they thought it would be.
When everyone in the family agrees that eighteen-year-old Haley is a downer, she wonders what happened to her as a child that changed her from “Happy Haley.” She visits a hypnotherapy doctor, who is really Roger in another of his alter-egos, and ends up regressing back to her six-year-old self. Meanwhile, Steve and his friends buy a slow cooker and try to make the perfect pork.
Stan is having problems with his computer at work and takes Steve to the CIA offices to fix it for him. After feeling slighted for not being “CIA material,” Steve is approached by the CIA’s nerdy arch rivals - the NSA - who convince him to help them spy on Stan in order to bring down his father’s beloved Agency. Meanwhile, when committed vegetarian Haley accidentally eats meat, she realizes she still loves the taste, and Roger convinces her to resume being a carnivore for one day of the year... but she takes the adventure a little too far.
Stan discovers his blood pressure is dangerously high and concludes his home life is to blame. Thinking time at the beach will help him relax he takes an assignment to infiltrate the local surf community to bring down a gang of renegade surfers. He enjoys the assignment and the relaxation so much that even after the gang turns out to be harmless, Stan takes action to ensure he can continue hanging out with them. Meanwhile, back at the Smith home, Jeff and Haley have a pregnancy scare, Steve befriends a homeless drifter, and Roger tries to get FIFA to host the next World Cup in the Smith’s back yard.
After Steve and Snot are humiliated at a “cool kids” party, they decide to throw a party of their own and only invite other unpopular kids. When they do, they start to experience their own popularity, but soon learn that becoming popular could radically alter their futures, leaving Steve faced with a difficult decision. Meanwhile, when Roger and Haley dine out, he takes it personally when the waitress compliments her order but not his.
When Stan buys Francine Washington Nationals’ season tickets for her birthday – a gift clearly meant more for him than for her – she is upset. As he starts to worry that they have nothing in common, the situation goes from bad to worse when the couple cannot even manage a proper kiss for the stadium’s ‘Kiss Cam,’ and Stan sets out to make things right between them. Meanwhile, Roger resumes the previously discarded persona of Nevada politician Burt Jarvis after his constituents begin to get sick from poisonous drinking water, and Steve convinces him he needs to stop whoever is responsible for contaminating the water supply
Stan is excited when he is put in charge of the CIA’s number one fundraiser, the annual calendar. He hires Haley to be his assistant, but she has ulterior motives for taking the job. Meanwhile, Roger decides to go to college, but his plans get derailed when on his first day he gets a new “Discovery” credit card and becomes obsessed with charging enough to earn a jacket branded with the card’s logo.
Steve is selling chocolate for his school’s charity drive, but after Roger eats the whole box without paying, Steve accuses him of being selfish. Later, when Steve is accused of stealing from the charity, he gets put in the “At-Risk” class comprised of the school’s worst troublemakers, and Roger shows up posing as a new teacher in order to disprove Steve’s assertion. Meanwhile, Stan takes up residence in a retirement home.
Steve is selling chocolate for his school’s charity drive, but after Roger eats the whole box without paying, Steve accuses him of being selfish. Later, when Steve is accused of stealing from the charity, he gets put in the “At-Risk” class comprised of the school’s worst troublemakers, and Roger shows up posing as a new teacher in order to disprove Steve’s assertion. Meanwhile, Stan takes up residence in a retirement home.
After local news anchorman Greg and his longtime boyfriend and co-anchor Terry split up, Francine tries to help Greg find a new partner. But when she agrees to fill in as Greg’s temporary co-anchor on the nightly news she soon becomes blinded by her own success. Meanwhile, when Roger plays an old board game called “Dream Phone,” he becomes obsessed with one of the game’s “Dreamboys” and sets out to meet the real life model the fictional character is based on.
After Roger meets Meredith, the most interesting woman in Langley Falls, he struggles to create a new, more fabulous persona. When he fails, Francine suggests the dejected alien embark on a journey of self discovery, which doesn’t go exactly as planned. Meanwhile, when Stan and the others overdo their CrossFit workout they are too sore to move, and Klaus takes advantage of the situation to throw himself a party.
With Stan away on a mission, Roger convinces Francine to play the “Widow Game,” which entails the two of them posing as widows in order to gain sympathy and free stuff. Francine’s carefree fun turns to worry when she starts to seriously contemplate how she’d survive if Stan really were to die. Meanwhile, Steve and his friends stage wrestling matches in the basement, but things get out of hand when an uninvited participant shows up; and Roger embarks on a career as a marketing executive.
When Francine finds Steve and his friends LARP-ing (Live-Action-Role-Playing) a sci-fi fantasy in a local dog park, she joins in the game and discovers she’s more accepted and comfortable among the nerds than at her own home and starts spending more time with her son's friends, which Steve hates. Meanwhile, when Stan installs a shark aquarium in the kitchen he needs to find a way to pay for the additional expense, so Roger convinces him to turn the house into "OceanLand," a SeaWorld knock-off.
When Stan tries to teach Steve respect for the Bible, he decides to go through the good book with his son, story by story. But Stan’s plan backfires as Steve constantly points out legitimate flaws in the logic of the stories, which in turn causes Stan to lose his faith, and plunges him into a depression which even Roger can’t shake him out of. Steve is tasked with helping get the “old” Stan back and succeeds, but perhaps too well, as Stan comes to believe he is a modern day Noah and leads the family on a trip to find his Ark.
As life on Stan’s “Ark” continues, everyone except Roger is growing weary of their time at sea, but the Smiths’ lives go from bad to worse when the ship sinks. After abandoning ship, Stan and Francine find themselves marooned on a desert island where they re-discover each other; Jeff and Haley are rescued by a U.S. Navy ship, which inspires him to try to make a much needed change; and Steve drifts in his lifeboat with Roger’s alter-ego, survivalist “Buck Wett-Nap.”
With a 2-on- 2 basketball tournament approaching, Roger’s alter-ego of local basketball legend “Billy Jesusworth” gets injured and is unable to compete at his usual level. Stan reluctantly invites him to play with his league of "old heads," but his act of kindness backfires when Roger steals away Stan’s tournament partner. Meanwhile, Steve sings the tale of his day at school, which includes getting caught hiding in the girls’ locker room, and the adventures that ensue.
When Stan discovers a salt deposit beneath the ground in the family’s backyard, he tries to sell the valuable find to the Gordon Salt Company. Stan’s plans hit a snag when it’s discovered that he signed the backyard’s mining rights over to Steve years ago, and now, Steve refuses to sell... leading the others to try and change his mind for their own personal gain.
It’s President’s Day, and Stan drags Haley out for what has become their traditional holiday visit to a presidential museum – a tradition Haley hates. This year it’s the President Garfield museum. The history lesson takes an unexpected turn when Stan steals some of Garfield’s DNA samples from the museum and “Jurassic-Park”’s the dead president back to life. Meanwhile, Steve has joined the school’s newspaper and every story he writes reads like soft-core pornography, which raises his profile, and the paper’s circulation.
The CIA’s office holiday party comes to a swift end when one of the agents neglects to bring a gift for the Evil Santa grab-bag, leaving Bullock empty handed and furious. Bullock assigns Stan to the case, but when his investigation hits a dead end – because he’s the guilty party – Stan enlists the help of Roger’s alter-ego, detective “Ace Crouton,” to help him lay the blame elsewhere. Meanwhile, Steve tries a new tact to win over the girls... being a gentleman. The ploy has mixed results, but leads to a profitable new venture.
Stan tries to bond with Steve but it proves to be a difficult task because they have nothing in common, until he discovers that his son is a naturally good bowler. However, after a Father-Son tournament, Steve is approached by a former pro-bowler who says Stan is a terrible coach, and offers to coach the boy himself. Stan is forced to simply be supportive of his son, which is easier said than done… until they find a new activity over which to bond. Meanwhile, Roger and Haley compete to see who has the worse attention span.
In order to avoid being sent on a suicide mission, Stan learns how to become a DJ to beat Bullock in a DJ battle. Jeff takes up drinking psychadelic teas and Roger helps him.
A sexy new next-door neighbor promises to take Steve and his friends' virginity in return for housework.
Greg and Terry choose to adopt a Russian child but after Roger sees the kind of life they are living over there, he gets rid of the real kid and takes the place himself.
Roger and Francine stumble upon another alien in the woods and Roger tries to romance her, but he soon becomes annoyed with her behavior and wants to call the CIA to have them take her away, but then he has a change of heart and decides not to.
Hayley dyes her hair blonde, so boys will listen to her when she talks about charities. Stan and Steve look for a new house.
Stan and his fellow CIA agents are in danger of losing their jobs to advancing technology. They plan a dangerous heist to prove that humans are smarter than machines.
Steve and Snot are fed up with being bullied. When they enroll in a karate class, Snot is brainwashed by the sensei and its Steve's mission to get him back. Meanwhile, Klaus develops a horrible odor and is forced into being an outside pet.
On furlough from work, Stan takes a temporary job as a security guard for a community college. Meanwhile, Roger tries to earn extra money for the family by turning the house into an inn.
Francine's trouble-making sister, Gwen, comes to live with the family and her arrival dredges up a long-buried secret from Francine's past.
Stan grows tired of his daily responsibilities and makes a Christmas wish to swap lives with the fee-spirited Principal Lewis.
Haley and Steve join an all girl Rollerblading team, while Stan and Francine get a visit from an all knowing gardener.
Steve seeks his independence from Francine by becoming an online video cooking sensation.
Hayley considers having an affair with a married man, what about Jeff?
Stan and Francine travel to Hollywood for vacation. An aging movie star believes Stan is the reincarnation of a Hollywood legend and uses him to make one last film.
Francine becomes a successful self-published mystery novelist and the family travels to New York to attend a convention.
Stan is traumatized by a random act of violence and seeks to establish a sense of control by creating a miniature version of Langley Falls.
Jeff has escaped from space, or has he?
A Chinese billionaire purchases the "American Dad!" TV show and remakes it as he sees fit.
Stan suffers the drastic side effects of taking a seizure medication.
Thwarted in their efforts to secure dates for the upcoming high school prom, Steve and Snot turn to the CIA’s cloning machine to churn out two willing ladies. But, when the device produces two uber-fast-growing newborn babies, the boys must break out their fathering skills to ready them in time for prom night. Meanwhile, Stan takes home the CIA’s cloned pet, Daren the Dodo, with disastrous consequences.
Francine’s “Poltergasm” starts to haunt the Smith household when she is unsatisfied by Stan in the sack, and Roger must conjure a medium named Zelda Rubinstein to help eliminate the ghost. Meanwhile, Hayley introduces her new boy-toy, Mauricio, to the family.
Steve is eager to prove that he’s no longer a little boy, so he sets off to prove his manhood by joining Stan, Bullock, and the rest of the CIA on their annual hunting trip. Meanwhile, Roger and Klaus set off on a cross-country road trip.
In a desperate attempt to show Steve that she’s still a “cool” mom, Francine teaches him a vast array of shoplifting techniques to try out at the local mall. When their attempt to pull off the ultimate heist at “The Gash” goes awry, Steve is captured and sent to a Venezuelan sweatshop. Meanwhile, Roger, Hayley and Klaus form Langley Falls’ first Russian Balalaika trio.
Stan’s plans for a perfect Thanksgiving watching football in his underwear are thwarted when Francine invites her adoptive parents to join them for the holiday. Meanwhile, Francine’s mom encourages Hayley to get back on the dating scene and invites an eligible bachelor over, but her true intentions are revealed at Thanksgiving dinner.
Determined to get Snot to confront his emotions after his father passes away, Steve and friends embark on an epic cross-country road trip to the funeral. But Steve’s commitment to his friend wavers when he falls for a Pixie Dream Girl along the way. Meanwhile, Stan and Roger invent an automatic cake-cutter for the Home Shopping Network, but their partnership is tested when they only make a “verbal agreement” to split the profits.
In this Breaking Bad parody, Hayley tries to fit in with a popular group of her former high school friends and, in the process, discovers Steve has an amazing ability to create incredibly realistic fake IDs. Sensing a business opportunity, Hayley builds out Steve’s operation, but they don’t count on having to deal with the other kingpin of the Langley Falls fake ID game: Kevin Ramage (Roger in disguise).
When Steve starts acting like a spoiled brat during the holidays, Stan takes him to see his incarcerated Grandpa Jack, who tells him the story of how he caught Minstrel Krampus, a legendary demon who punishes naughty children on Christmas. Stan decides that releasing Krampus is the only way to straighten out Steve’s attitude. But when Krampus kidnaps Steve, it’s up to Stan and Roger to get him back. Meanwhile, Hayley gets a job at the airport, but quickly realizes that she might not be cut out for customer service.
Roger suffers a horrific car crash as he tries to take a picture of his crotch on a traffic speed cam, and when he wakes up from his coma, he starts to have Dead Zone-esque visions of the future, saving the Smiths from a terrible fire. But Roger’s abuse of his newfound powers soon draws the ire of his fellow family members, and the Smiths must learn to cope with the uncertainty of the future.
Francine is eager to re-live the Smith kids’ childhood theme park adventures on a family visit to “Familyland.” But, when the nefarious and cryogenically-frozen founder of the theme park, Roy Family, is mistakenly thawed, the Smiths find themselves prisoners of the medieval-themed park.
Stan mixes up his nighttime routine after his 100th kill, but mistakenly unleashes a “good” Stan in his sleep – Jekyll & Hyde-style – who’s hell-bent on pursuing all the good deeds that real Stan would never consider, and stopping him from ever killing again.
Roger forges a radical plan to help Steve date the hot girl at school Roger will switch faces with Steve “Face/Off”-style, seduce her, then tag Steve back in after she’s fallen for him. But, Roger soon decides he may actually want to keep her for himself. Meanwhile, Stan and Francine become “Charlie’s Angels”-type airline stewardesses to thwart an evil plan by Mark Cuban (guest-voicing as himself) to blow up the sun.
Stan is frustrated that Steve and his friends never play outside, but Francine refuses to let Stan take the kids to the woods for some outdoor fun. Of course, Stan finds a loophole, by drugging the kids and putting them on the CIA’s holodeck, which, naturally, goes awry. Meanwhile, Hayley buys Roger’s home star on the International Star Registry and claims she’s now his queen.
Stan takes an experimental drug that instantly turns him into a "woman.”
Stan attempts to infiltrate the “Occupy” movement, based on CIA intelligence that a leftist cell is planning a terrorist attack. But when he’s captured and returned home by a group of radicals, Hayley suspects her father may have been “turned.”
Stan fears that Hayley has no life skills, so he forces her to take a job as a bartender in Roger’s attic haunt. However, when Bullock (guest voice Patrick Stewart) becomes Hayley’s best customer, Stan realizes that he can use his daughter’s knowledge to get ahead at work.
Stan’s co-workers at the CIA teach him about “rubbernecking,” the art of checking out other women on the sly, away from the gaze of their wives. But when Stan causes a massive accident in an attempt to take a picture of an attractive jogger, he’s interviewed by an intimidating insurance inspector who may rat out Stan to Francine. Meanwhile, Roger and Klaus spill wine on the Smiths’ brand new couch, and vow never to tell the other family members... by sitting on the stained spot for the rest of their lives.
Stan is fired from the CIA in a round of budget cuts, but since his 20 years of work experience are classified and hidden from his “permanent record”, the only job he’s able to land is at the local grocery store where Steve is the manager. Meanwhile, Roger bets an annoying coffee shop musician that he can outplay him in one week. To accomplish his goal, he enters into a Faustian bargain with Lorenzo, a guitar-instructing infomercial host.
Hayley starts an internship at a local news station working for a Nancy Grace-type reporter, who happens to be Roger in disguise.
A year after Jeff’s abduction, Hayley is still heartbroken, until she meets Millionaire Matt Davis, who may be able to help her move forward. Things are going great, until Steve and Snot catch a signal on a CB radio – Jeff’s alive in space and trying to make it back to Hayley.
Roger opens a crooner’s bar in the Smith family’s attic and recruits Hayley as his main entertainer. Soon, all of Langley Falls becomes enthralled by her singing voice – including Roger, who takes his crush on Hayley a bit too far. Meanwhile, Stan tries to prove his manhood by negotiating a good deal on a new car.
The Smith family’s tropical vacation turns out to be anything but relaxing when Stan is assigned a mission to kill the activities director at their resort, whom his boss at the CIA insists is an ex-war criminal. Meanwhile, Hayley and Jeff try to rekindle their fading romance, while Roger, as his latest persona, Abigail Lemonparty, falls for an older gentleman.
Francine fears that she and Stan are growing apart because he spends so much time hanging out with his buddies at the “CIA Chill House.” Meanwhile, Steve and his friends are recruited to join a boy band and make a music video.
Stan invites his mother to come live with the family after Stan’s stepfather dies, and tensions rise when Roger is forced to share his attic with her. But Roger and Stan’s mom quickly fall in love and get married, and Stan is forced to deal with Roger as his new stepdad. Meanwhile, Steve and his friends discover a mysterious plane crash while on a bike ride and come across a long-lost script of a Fast and Furious movie that they are determined to get mad
Stan decides that Snot isn’t cool enough to be Steve’s best friend, so he attempts to separate them by staging a shooting at an ice cream parlor. Snot is the only witness, and is placed in the CIA Witness Protection program. Meanwhile, Roger hires Jeff to clean his attic for extra cash, but keeps robbing him every time he goes back downstairs.
The Smith family’s regular babysitter, Lindsay, breaks her leg in a soccer match, so Stan and Francine are forced to leave Steve with Hayley, despite her track record of being extremely irresponsible. When Hayley teases Steve about being a goody-two-shoes, Steve is determined to prove her wrong and sneaks out of the house to go to a party with the cool kids.
A Langley Falls talk show outs Francine as "Baby Franny," the toddler who was once rescued from a well by a heroic fireman. Then, on the anniversary of her rescue, she falls down the well again and makes a shocking discovery. Meanwhile, Stan and Roger have an entrepreneurial "eureka!" moment when they think of the world’s next game-changing business opportunity – male stripper shoes.
Francine encourages the family to give up their various vices, but they all get drunk at Roger’s Mardi Gras party and enter into a harrowing pact with Bullock; he’s allowed to cut off the finger of the first person who cheats. Meanwhile, a pastie is left in the attic, Cinderella-style, and Roger sets out to find the “perfect bosom” on which to place it.
Francine tries to teach Roger the value of hard work after his character “Twill Ongenbone” fakes a degree in archaeology, but she quickly regrets her decision. Meanwhile, Steve asks Stan questions about Stan’s past for a school project, but is shocked by what he hears.
In a tribute to and send-up of the Pulitzer Prize-winning play, August: Osage County, a dark secret is revealed about the Smith family’s past when Francine invites Stan’s incarcerated dad, Jack, to Stan’s birthday party. Also in this spoof, Roger plays Edna, a maid who nurses Bullock and Hayley’s love child. But when Edna falls in love with Bullock, it could mean dire consequences for the kid.
Roger announces that “Max Jets,” a character of Roger’s who enjoys showering the Smith family with money, is soon getting out of prison. But a wrench is thrown in the system when Max falls in love with Gina, a gold-digging waitress who threatens the family’s inheritance.
Roger pretends to be Jeff’s imaginary friend, so he can freely roam naked around the house with no disguise. But when big-mouth Jeff figures out that Roger is an alien, Stan issues an ultimatum: either Roger or Jeff must be killed immediately. Meanwhile, Steve becomes insecure about the shape of his rear end.
In Part 2 of “The Tearjerker Saga,” a “James Bond” parody, Stan and his wife Sexpun Tocome’s honeymoon is brutally interrupted when Black Villain fatally shoots Sexpun. Determined to get his revenge, Stan teams up with former nemesis The Tearjerker to track down Black Villain and put a stop to his evil plan to melt the arctic glaciers.
Francine discovers Steve’s special talent that will help him get into a great school: spelling. But when she fears that Steve is being distracted by Hiko’s sister, Akiko, she takes drastic measures to ensure victory at the Pearl Bailey High School Spelling Bee. Meanwhile, Stan and Roger want Hayley to line-judge their badminton game, but she’s still devastated over Jeff, so they decide to push her through the five stages of grief as quickly as possible.
Francine does all she can to make Stan take on a different mission. And when he does, she learns that her missionary man is all she really needs. Then, Hayley tries to get back into the dating scene - with disastrous results - and reluctantly submits to Snot’s advance, agreeing to a dinner date.
Francine tries to mold Stan into her ideal husband when he gets amnesia after falling off an arcade game during a CIA operation to capture the “real” Osama bin Laden (who, apparently, has been managing a “Dave and Buster’s” restaurant in Florida). Meanwhile, Roger lets Steve join his paper route to earn some extra money, but Steve is drawn into the corrupt side of the business.
Stan is shocked when Agent Crisp from CIA Internal Affairs tells him that Deputy Director Bullock is showing early signs of dementia and must have his memory erased. Meanwhile, Steve runs into a bully at school, so Roger hires an old friend – Stelio Kontos – to take care of the problem.
In the special 150th episode, the series travels to the slave spaceship that abducted Jeff – with Roger’s help – after Jeff discovered his secret (hint: Roger is an alien). To find his way home, Jeff must first prove to the evil Emperor Zing that he was always in love with Hayley.
Klaus discovers his original human body, but Stan refuses to help him switch back. So, Klaus steals Stan's body and Stan becomes the fish. Meanwhile, Roger turns the attic into a gym and tries to pressure Steve into a long-term membership.
When the stress of life finally gets to Stan, he is convinced by Principal Brian Lewis to purchase a hot tub.However, things don't go as planned when the hot tub Stan chooses comes to life & decides it wants Stan all to itself.
In the third installment of FOX's hurricane trilogy, Stan convinces the family they can ride out the storm. However, it is quickly learned that Stan cannot make good and rational decisions while facing a crisis.
Roger convinces Stan & Francine to let his be guardian of Steve so they can skip a school function, however when Roger puts a stop to the too close relationship Steve has with Principal Brian Lewis, Steve runs away from home. Meanwhile, Stan and Francine have a much needed vacation away from the kids at the world's largest water park, although reality doesn't quite meet their expectation.
When Stan realizes he may never achieve his dream of being a best man, he convinces Principal Brian Lewis to marry. However, things don't go as planned when Brian's first 'wife' shows up at the wedding. Meanwhile, Roger comes across a perfect pair of shorts and after a disappointing night with Ricky Martin begins to question his self confidence.
After realizing that he has missed every milestone in Steve’s life, Stan uses CIA tech, a hot blond avatar, in order to become closer to him, even if it mean losing his virginity to him. Meanwhile Roger gets revenge on 6 frat boys who skipped out on paying him for his limo driving services.
Francine becomes jealous after Stan happens to run into an old CIA crush. In her jealously she convinces Roger to woo her. Meanwhile, after accidentally putting on Hayley's panties, Steve realizes his luck as changed.
After denied the role of Jesus by Father Donovan for being too fat, Roger is cast in the annual mall Christmas play. An enraged Stan beats Roger up in full view of the town and news which causes him to be excommunicated. Meanwhile Hayley & Jeff adopt a son & Stan finds out the only way back into the church is to kill the child.
Steve tries desperately to prove to his dad that he is brave. Meanwhile, Francine thinks she may be pregnant.
In order to teach Steve the value of earning something you really want, Stan gets him at the Havercamp Country Club. Before Steve can work hard, Mr. Vanderhill (Roger in disguise) hires him to be his assistant. Meanwhile, Klaus helps Francine come up with a catch phrase when she feels she won't be remembered.
During the latest case for Wheels and the Legman, Stan joins the firm, however things don't go as planned after Stan is kidnapped. Meanwhile, Klaus insists to Francine and Hayley he can his photos submitted to CutePetPics.com
After Stan is hexed by an old man, he begins to age rapidly and the only way to beat it and return to normal is to climb Mount Kilimanjaro. Meanwhile Roger and Francine train for a dance competition that may not be what it seems.
When Barry threatens Stan’s old high school wrestling record, Stan enlists Roger in school to beat Barry and defend his small claim to fame. However, Stan is caught off-guard when Roger, not Barry, is actually the threat to Stan’s record.
Roger acts as the Smith family therapist under his “Dr. Penguin” alter-ego, but his services are put on hold when he is sent to Iraq to fight in the war. Klaus seizes his opportunity to be the go-to counselor of the household, but ends up causing a major ruckus.
Once again, Stan refuses to allow Steve to have a dog but Francine goes behind his back and buys a puppy names Kisses. After a horrible accident and thanks to a traumatic childhood incident, Stan refuses to let go of Kisses and instead ops for an experimental medical procedure.
After finally getting sick of Hayley & Jeff sponging off him and not contributing, Stan bets the young couple that he and Francine can live one month on only $1000. Meanwhile, after being taunted by Klaus' boast of once driving a Ferrari, Steve and Roger vow they must do the same.
Hayley convinces Francine to get reacquainted with an old friend and after joining them in a night of heavy drinking, winds up in the hospital in need of a kidney transplant. Upon hearing the news Stan is willing to donate one of his kidneys but Francine confesses that Hayley may not be his daughter due to a bachelorette party indiscretion. In order to find the man who is the right kidney match, Stan and Francine travel back in time to discover who she slept with on that fateful night.
Roger rediscovers his alter-ego “Ricky Spanish,” an infamous character who remains the most despised man in town. Meanwhile, Stan and Francine are in for a surprise when their sponsored child from Africa shows up on their doorstep.
When Stan catches Steve playing imaginary games with his toys, he decides to take his son down to Mexico to help him become a man. But the trip takes a turn for the worse when Stan and Steve are kidnapped by a drug cartel, and it’s up to Steve to break himself and Stan out of captivity.
When Hayley & Jeff elope, Stan & Francine decide to give $10,000 to anyone who can stop the wedding.
After Stan creates a clone of Steve, Francine and Stan compete with each other to determine who has better parenting skills. Meanwhile, Roger tracks down the AWOL bride and groom in Thailand.
It's Halloween and Stan is determined to have the scariest haunted house in the neighborhood. But when Buckle has the scariest house in the neighborhood, Stan is determined to beat him and goes to great lengths for it.
Stan is ecstatic when Roger offers to help him live out his lifelong dream of opening a restaurant to rival his favorite childhood haunt.
After an argument between Stan and Francine breaks out, Stan suggests they go see a counselor, who hypnotizes Francine and reawakens her lifelong dream of being a comedian.
It's Thanksgiving in Langley Falls, and as usual, Stan invites his half-brother, Rusty, over to show off his cornucopia of wealth and good fortune. But when Stan finds out that Rusty is far wealthier than he led on, Stan tries to take from Rusty what he feels is rightfully his. Things don't go well, and the Smith family nearly loses it all.
If there's one thing that Stan Smith loves, it's a good jury trial. He anxiously awaits his annual jury summons. But when Roger is the defendant in the trial where Stan is the foreman, he is finally in a position to make Roger accountable for his misdeeds. Meanwhile, Jeff and Hayley move in with the Smiths, and Francine tries to get Jeff to clean up his act.
Stan gives Steve a gun for Christmas, even though Francine warns him that Steve is too young. As usual, Stan ignores her, and when Steve accidentally shoots Santa, he sends the North Pole into a tizzy and jeopardizes Christmas.
After Roger releases lethal gas into the Smith residence, the family moves into a hotel while the fumes clear. With no housework to do, Francine finds herself with a lot of free time on her hands. After befriending the hotel concierge, she soon finds herself working in the construction business, but realizes that perhaps she is better suited for family life.
When Stan and Francine meet a young couple, Tom and Cami, their predictable lives get a shot of adrenaline as they do their best to keep up with the younger couple's crazy and adventurous lifestyle. But it isn't long before Stan and Francine struggle to keep up and come up with a plan to slow Tom and Cami down permanently.
With a flair for the dramatic, Roger invites Stan to attend one of his acting classes. However, tempers flare when they both audition for the same role, leaving them to duke it out for top dog. Meanwhile, Steve and his friends get into a pillow fight when they try to plan the greatest slumber party ever.
When Stan and Roger disagree over a recent string of events, Roger moves out of the house in protest but is quickly replaced by another warm body. After Roger learns of the replacement roomie, the two of them battle for Stan's affection. Meanwhile, Steve gets a new job at school that allows him to do a little self-promotion over the P.A. system.
When Steve finishes his dinner first, it completely freaks Stan out! Stan is convinced that Steve is challenging him for family dominance and about to dethrone him. After Steve learns that his father is feeling threatened by him, he couldn’t be happier. He begins besting him in everything that Stan holds dear to his heart, from brushing his teeth to going to the bathroom. Convinced that his rein is over and Steve has replaced him as man of the house, he decides to take matters into his own hands by mating with Francine and having Steve “accidentally” discover them in the heat of the moment, traumatizing Steve.Roger comes to the rescue and throws...
In an attempt to advance in the CIA, Stan begins playing golf with Senator Buckingham. Things are going well until Roger accidentally sells the senator's daughter to a drug lord, forcing Stan to choose between family and his career.
When Steve has trouble crossing over into the 'cool kids' social circle, Klaus and Roger place their bets to see how quickly Roger can make him cool. Everything they try backfires until Steve becomes the in-crowds designated driver. Meanwhile, Stan and Francine take turns pranking each other.
After Snot professes his love for Hayley and gets shot down, Steve and Roger devise a plan to cheer him up. Roger dresses up as Steve's cousin from New Jersey, Jenny Fromdabloc, and Snot falls hard for her. Meanwhile, Stan wants to live like a gentleman of the 1960s, complete with dark suits and dry martinis.
Stan and Francine fight over how to redecorate the house. It goes so far that they split the house down the middle and try to live without each other.
Francine gets a job at Stan's office, which cramps Stan's style and his ability to flirt with co-workers. When Francine retaliates with a little flirting of her own, war breaks out at work.
Stan spends some quality father-son time with Steve at the local zoo, but things go horribly wrong when Steve slips into a gorilla exhibit. Meanwhile, Roger bets Hayley that he can become a great Country singer and sets out to write the most heartbreaking song of all time.
When Steve is selected to sing the national anthem at the Langley Falls Veterans' Day celebration, he gets some heat from Stan who doesn't think he's ready for such an undertaking. Unimpressed with Steve's vocal talents, Stan decides Steve needs to experience real war in order to sing about our country's military prowess. But things quickly go south when Roger gets involved and Steve goes bananas
After Stan blows Roger off once again, he realizes he needs his help again. Stan tricks Roger into believing they are going on a trip to a remote island while in actuality Roger is standing in for the island dictator.
Steve is left alone while the rest of the family visits colleges for Hayley. While the family is gone, Steve inadvertently crashes a military drone.
Fearing Francine will realize he is boring and leave him, Stan hatches a plan to keep Roger in the attic for a long time.
Steve must become the man of the house when Stan re-lives his childhood.
Upset that Francine has let herself go, Stan takes drastic measures when she asks him to renew their wedding vows.
After attending a concert with Hayley, Stan becomes obsessed with her music.
Upset that Hayley no longer wants his advice, Stan decides to prove that she is missing out on his sage counseling. After meeting a stripper on an important CIA mission, Stan takes it upon himself to improve her life and show Hayley that his advice works. But when he opens a new business, hoping to prove Hayley wrong, he finds himself dancing for cash to cover up his failures
The Rapture happens on Christmas Eve, and Stan is left behind.
When Francine demands that Stan get rid of his gas-guzzling SUV because it's draining the family of money, he hatches a plan with Roger at the local horse track to avoid giving up his ride. Meanwhile, it's up to Steve and his friends to help out an old friend
Stan puts down liberal social programs because he thinks they're a waste of money and gives Francine a hard time for lending a helping hand at the local homeless shelter. When Stan develops a nasty addiction and needs help, he suddenly has a change of heart
Francine questions her relationship with Stan when his more romantic cyborg counterpart from the future arrives; Roger directs Steve and his pals in a remake of The Goonies.
When Stan admits that his heroes include Ronald Reagan and the 1980 U.S. Olympic Hockey Team, including Michael Eruzione and Rob McClanahan, Roger confesses that he played on the team as Chex LeMeneux. But when Roger comes clean that he took steroids to win, they both lose. Meanwhile, Reginald tries to win over Hayley by taking her to a concert.
After Francine is mugged and Roger fails to do nothing, he decides to become a police officer. However, Roger soon takes matters into his own hands when justice doesn't come fast enough dealing with the mugger.
After Stan bails, Roger goes with Francine to wine country which results in a drunken kiss between the two of them.
In order to teach Steve to stand up for himself and be more assertive, Stan becomes Steve's personal bully.
When the Buckle and Shari move into the neighborhood, the Smiths attend their housewarming party.
Even after Roger insists the family gives him a roast for his 1601st birthday, his feelings get hurt to the point he decided the Smiths must die.
The Smith family gets ready to celebrate Roger's big 1-6-double-0, but are sidetracked by Steve's horrifying announcement that he's going through puberty! With the wounds still fresh from Hayley going through 'the change' in their minds, Stan and Francine use experimental medicine to try and bypass the growing pains of having another teenager with raging hormones.
When Roger discovers that someone has maxed out his credit card, he is certain it is identify theft and is determined to bring down the crook. After playing 'Matlock' for a few days and dishing out some street justice, he realizes things are not quite right and seem all too familiar.
When Stan becomes his boss' go-to guy, he feels like he can't say no to anything including outrageous personal requests. But when Francine gets roped into the annoying ordeal and her romantic Valentine's Day get-away is ruined, she lays down the law and forces Stan to say NO.
Stan becomes jealous when he finds out Francine was once engaged to a pilot whose plane crashed. Little does she know that her lost love is still alive, but when Stan and Roger track him down, Francine is forced to choose between the two men.
Discouraged with the way the current student government at Pearl Bailey High School is being run, Steve convinces his fellow nerd (and current girlfriend) Debbie to challenge the status quo (and popular cheerleader Lisa) and run for class President. After Debbie falls victim to a humiliating smear campaign, Steve sets out to defend her honor, but when his revenge scheme hits a snag, Steve and the guys find themselves on the run from every clique in the school.
Hayley goes on a rampage after her boyfriend breaks up with her, but she calms down when she begins dating stan's cia body double, bill. Stan heartily approves of the match, but the sight of bill makes francine queasy. As for bill, he thinks francine is hot. Meanwhile, steve and roger get jobs separating male and female chicks at a chinatown hatchery, but stan revolts when he learns what happens to the chicks after he's finished sexing them.
Hayley goes on a rampage after her boyfriend breaks up with her, but she calms down when she begins dating stan's cia body double, bill. Stan heartily approves of the match, but the sight of bill makes francine queasy. As for bill, he thinks francine is hot. Meanwhile, steve and roger get jobs separating male and female chicks at a chinatown hatchery, but stan revolts when he learns what happens to the chicks after he's finished sexing them.
When Steve suffers indignities in school because of the back brace he must wear for his scoliosis, Stan confides in him that he wears a wig to cover his baldness. Meanwhile, Roger invites both Francine and Hayley to a posh spa even though he has only two passes, so he sneaks in Hayley in a suitcase, raising the suspicions of the house detective.
When a co-worker gives Stan pills that allow him to stay up all night but still feel rested, he spends his nights on his hobbies, but soon discovers that he’d rather spend time with Francine.
When the Smiths try to plan a family game night, Roger is full of excuses about prior commitments. However, when he is caught in a lie, the Smiths feel stabbed in the back when they realize Roger has been cheating on them with other families. Stan, Francine, Hayley and Steve go on the offensive to teach Roger a lesson about monogamy until Roger has a breakthrough about why he isn't a one family kind-of-guy.
When Langley Falls implements a ban on trans fats, Stan finds himself legally separated from his favorite foods. He sets a poor example for the rest of the family when he blatantly disregards the law by crossing county lines and using Steve as a trans-fatty food mule to satisfy his own gluttonous desires.
When Stan forgets to pick up grenadine at the grocery store, Roger goes ballistic and vows to get him back by taking over a project close to Stan's heart - the Homeowner's Association. When Roy Rogers McFreely is appointed chairman of the association and starts to abuse his power, Stan, Hayley and Steve lead the opposition to preserve the small town's 'American' values and take the community back from 'the man'.
Steve signs Stan up for a father-son bike tournament, but the plan veers off-track when Stan admits that his father never taught him how to ride a bike. Determined to make things better, Steve helps reconcile Stan with his convict father. Meanwhile, Hayley needs internship credit for school, so Roger hires her to bartend at his makeshift bar in the attic.
Steve and the gang sabotage a stuck-up kid's bar mitzvah after he hits on Steve's girlfriend, Debbie. But when Snot gets wrongly accused of stealing the kid's bar mitzvah money, he must answer to the Rabbi and his own celebration is in jeopardy. Meanwhile, Stan and Francine pitch a cell phone idea to Verizon, but the plan gets fuzzy when they can't deliver the goods.
When Stan gets kidnapped in Colombia, Francine fears he's gone for good. Stan finally reappears unharmed, but the real trouble erupts in the Smith household when he admits that he has a plan to marry his dentist if Francine dies before him. Meanwhile, Steve and Roger play detective duo 'Wheels and the Legman'.
Stan is excited about finally building his dream car: a DeLorean. Francine encourages him to include Steve, so the two take a road trip in search of doors for the sports car. The trip veers off-track when there is a mad dash across the country to get the last set of doors available.
Steve joins a junior football team to make Stan proud. However, when a hyper-competitive Stan assumes the position of head coach, Steve gets kicked off the team for not being good enough. Out for revenge, Steve and Roger recruit a new team of misfits who threaten Stan's perfect season. Meanwhile, Francine and Hayley compete for a blue ribbon at the Langley County Fair.
Stan has had enough of Roger's antics! When he calls Roger out, Roger claims he has been sent to Earth to determine the fate of mankind. Stan challenges him to prove it, and is tickled pink when he learns Roger's real purpose for being on Earth. Roger struggles to get a grip on reality until a fateful turn of events helps put things in perspective.
Neighbors Terry and Greg are nervous when Terry's father, football great Tank Bates, announces that he will be coming to town for a visit. Terry is worried because his dad doesn't know he's gay, has a baby or lives with his partner. Meanwhile, Steve goes on a drunken bender and learns the meaning of the phrase beer goggles.
Stan leaves Francine at home to go out with the boys, but guys' night out goes from wild to reckless when Stan finds himself in one compromising situation after another. Meanwhile, Roger and Hayley use their charm and looks to attract a frat boy.
UK Premiere - When Francine discovers that all of their family vacations have been artificially created memories, she gets very angry and demands a real vacation. However, when the vacation seems too good to be true, Francine is convinced it's the work of the CIA and causes the family to suffer the consequences. Meanwhile, Roger attempts to become the greatest actor who ever lived.
In order to be taken more seriously and to be a "Somebody," stan becomes a meter maid who seems to have all of the power. Now he's getting the best tables at restaurants (Threatening to ticket and tow), pocketing quarters from meters and impressing francine with his prowess. But, when turlington (Whitaker) from parking internal affairs pays him a visit, stan realizes crime and this lifestyle don't pay. Meanwhile, haley poses nude for a college art class and is surprised to see roger there.
Stan prays for a friend and thinks God sent him one, but he turns out to be an atheist. Stan tries to convince his friend that God exists by making his life extremely hard until his plan backfires. Meanwhile, Roger convinces Steve that he has been accepted to Hogwarts.
When Francine's adopted parents stop by for an unannounced stay, Stan is furious that they refuse to assimilate to his 'man of the house' ways. After he unsuccessfully tries to give them the boot, he is convinced that finding Francine's birth parents will change things. Meanwhile, Steve tries to live to the extreme in order to get to second base with the class hottie.
When Hayley decides to move to France because of imperialistic oppression, Stan will do anything to stop her including revealing the fact that she was brainwashed as a child by the CIA. Feeling desperate, Stan activates her trigger word and gains control over Hayley against the advice of his boss, Bullock. Everything is going fine until Stan remembers that if he doesnt change Hayley back to normal, there will be deadly consequences for him. Meanwhile, Steve and Roger become private Dick Tracys.
Because Stan is a veteran CIA agent, it seems like he must have killed lots of criminals. It turns out he has never killed anyone. His family eventually finds out that he’s never murdered a soul, and so does everybody else. Stan becomes the laughing stock of the CIA community. His family is ashamed, and wants absolutely nothing to do with him. It gets so embarrassing that two of his CIA buddies and Roger the Alien offer to take Stan out on the town, searching to find his first kill.
When Francine decides to be a surrogate for her gay neighbors Terry and Greg, Stan's Republican blood boils. Although he pretends to be happy, when the baby is born, Stan kidnaps her and heads to the Nebraska border, where gay couples have no rights. Meanwhile, Steve and Roger pull a Howard Hughes and become reclusive after they think Klaus is out to get them.
After Stan comes home from another dangerous mission, he finds that his family has decked the halls with boughs of holly and donned themselves with gay apparel, but just not to his satisfaction. He demands a grander Christmas starting with the search of a bigger and better tree in the forest. When his family has had enough, Stan powers on by himself, finds the perfect tree and meets an untimely end. While in Limbo, he has to fight for a second chance at life and battle the forces of good and evil to save his family.
After a big fight between Stan and Roger, Francine comes up with a plan to try and reunite the pair. Hoping to show Roger that Stan still cares about him, Francine fakes Roger's kidnapping, but when Stan never shows up to pay the ransom, it forces Roger to rethink the way he treats people.
Stan and the family are characters in a James Bond style spoof. Stan must stop Tearjerker, played by Roger, a diabolical film producer who makes movies that can kill. Tearjerker's fiendish plot involves abducting celebrities from his spa and replacing them with celebrity robots that make horrible movies, all in an effort to make his masterpiece 'Oscar's Gold' the best and saddest movie ever, causing millions of moviegoers to cry themselves to death.
When Stans mom gets dumped for the umpteenth time by a boyfriend, she comes running to Stan for support. Feeling threatened by her always-visiting mother-in-law, Francine is determined to cut Stans umbilical cord and figure out what keeps going wrong with the men in her life. Like a regular Cagney & Lacey, Francine and Roger go undercover to solve the case. Meanwhile, Klaus gives Steve the ick.
Francine pushes Stan to open up to her emotionally, but she gets more than she bargained for when he tells her that he killed her best friend Julie's husband. Meanwhile, Roger plays psychiatrist to help them work through their issues.
Stan goes in search of a former KGB agent, Sergei, and is shocked to find that the man is his new next-door neighbor and that Sergei has already turned Steve into a communist. Meanwhile, Roger and Klaus head to France for a little R&R but their trip takes a turn for the worse when Klaus gets busted for drug smuggling.
Roger begins to release photos of himself to the local media for extra cash, prompting the CIA to initiate an Alien Task Force. Through a twist of fate, Roger ends up in charge of the task force in disguise, creating tension at home as he is now Stan's boss. Meanwhile, Francine comes to grips with being left-handed and Roger frames Stan as an alien in attempt to keep his identity a secret.
Officially declared dead after an accident with a pudding truck, Stan comes back to life to realize his dream of leaving a legacy on the world and begins to excavate his home in search of Ollie North's 'Contra'-band buried treasure. As the search for gold goes 'North', life at home heads south as Hayley turns to body-piercing, Steve creates a robotic girlfriend and Roger files for sexual harassment.
Unappreciated by Stan, Francine visits her parents over spring break. Yet the family is unaware of Roger's own plans to become the 'King of Spring Break,' as he invites college coeds to come party at their revamped home. While Steve tries to lose his virginity to the luscious Carmen Selectra, Stan's tastes lead him to Jessica, his new Spring Break buddy. Stan must now decide whether the booze cruise with Jessica is better than married life.
When Stan tries to trick Steve into attending summer camp, things go horribly wrong and Steve ends up in a refugee camp. However, Stan, being the eternal optimist, joins Steve and manages to stage a camp Olympics between the refugees and the rebel faction living across the river.
Stan realizes his own weight problem after he criticizes Steve about his new, overweight girlfriend, so he goes overboard with exercising, and develops anorexia. Steve realizes that his overweight girlfriend is the root of his father's problems, and he has to make a hard choice in an effort to save his father's life.
Stan loses his confidence, and his job, when a car salesman gets the best of him in a negotiation. Meanwhile, Roger and Steve set up a makeshift drive-in to try to get to first base with popular schoolgirls.
Stan has his heart set on speaking at the Republican National Convention on behalf of the Langley chapter, but when they pass him up for another candidate, he accepts the only endorsement he gets from the local chapter of Gay Republicans. While the people around him disapprove of his new lifestyle choice, Stan decides to follow his heart to speak on their behalf.
After Francine tells Stan she's looking for excitement in their marriage, Stan gets in the driver's seat and becomes involved in drag racing to spice things up. Meanwhile, Hayley breaks up with her boyfriend, Jeff, who is emotionally crushed until he joins Steve's world of online gaming. When Hayley finds out, she tries to sabotage their fun.
When Steve's new relationship with his girlfriend gives Francine empty nest syndrome, she tries to convince Stan to have another baby. Meanwhile, Roger tries to enroll in college with Hayley in order to experience college life, but while Roger ends up teaching the class, Hayley finds a new crush in her classmate Ethan, who turns out to be far from normal.
When Francine discovers Stan's secret, decades-old passion for competitive figure skating, she decides to be supportive and becomes his pairs partner until Stan's competitive nature gets the best of him and he ditches her for a new partner. Meanwhile, Steve's classmate Snot finds new respect among his peers when he parades his mail-order bride around the playground.
When Roger helps Steve see that his father isn't as smart as he always believed, the power-hungry pair set their sights on fame and fortune in New York City. It doesn't take long for Roger to lose everything on Wall Street, and Steve contemplates prostitution after Jon Stewart shoots down his comedy routine. Meanwhile, the rest of the family is certain that the two have just run away to the tree house, so when it explodes in a lightning storm, they are devastated, but console themselves with Steve's college fund.
When an injunction prevents Langley Falls from lighting their annual Christmas tree, Stan blames secular non-believers for ruining his favorite holiday. With Stan's holiday spirit at an all-time low, the Ghost of Christmas Past visits him and tries to show him the true meaning of Christmas. However, Stan is convinced that Christmas can be saved by changing the outcome of Vietnam, but finds that changing the past only dramatically changes the future.
When Stan enters an essay contest to have his personal hero, President Bush, come over for dinner, he is overcome with joy when the President arrives at his doorstep. However, not everyone in the Smith family shares Stan's excitement. Hayley tries to drill President Bush on the Iraq war, and Steve and Roger attempt to convince him that they've found Osama Bin Laden, but instead get him drunk. Stan tries to save the President from public humiliation, while Hayley revels in his fall from glory.
When Stan feels like he's not climbing the ladder fast enough at work, he turns to his lifelong ambition of making festive teddy bears. However, when he realizes that making a quick profit takes a lot of work, he resorts to using illegal aliens as cheap labor. Meanwhile, Hayley sees her father's new business model as an atrocity and takes matters into her own hands by calling Uncle Sam.
When Roger is rejected by Steve, who seems to be over him, Roger heads out in search of a new human companion. But when this new friend starts to abuse Roger and the relationship turns into a lot of excuses and sorry's, Steve and Hayley scheme to get Roger out of the bad relationship and back home where he belongs. Meanwhile, Stan tours the Mr. Pibb factory and meets the man himself.
While researching a paper about George Washington Carver in celebration of Black History Month, Steve uncovers a conspiracy that's been going on since the Civil War. When the curator of the Smithsonian Peanut Museum reaches out to tell Steve the truth, he's mysteriously murdered, and Steve and Stan are tracked by a secret society that will stop at nothing to keep this scandalous secret of American history.
Stan arrives late to a CIA nuclear drill and thinks it's real. He decides to move the family into the mountains to survive the apocalypse. Even though he realizes his error, he begins to enjoy the attention that he gets from the family so much that he doesn't tell them the truth. However, when the family meets a mountain man and learns the truth, Stan has some explaining to do.
Stan sets Bullock up on a date with one of Francine's friends. Fearing that Francine will be right about the outcome of the date, Stan goes to great lengths to make sure it goes well by getting everyone drunk. Unfortunately, Bullock accidentally kills the woman, to which Stan frames Francine for the murder in order to keep her from asking so many questions.
After Stan discovers that Francine has a secret sex garden, he feels like their marriage may be crumbling. Looking to rekindle their romance, Francine asks for a divorce so that Stan can experience life as a bachelor again, and both learn a valuable lesson in love. Meanwhile, addicted to an energy drink, Steve finds himself panhandling in the streets to support his new habit.
When Stan brings home CIA equipment designed to eavesdrop on conversations, he finds out that his neighbors don't think too highly of him. In retaliation, Stan has the entire neighborhood evicted so that he can live free of any criticism. However, when an unexpected friend comes to his rescue, he realizes that gossip is a two-way street.
After Stan is prosecuted for sending contaminated cattle to a slaughterhouse, he says that it began as a quest to make a man out of Steve. Meanwhile, Roger sparks a cat fight between Francine and Hayley, for reasons of his own.
Roger becomes a bounty hunter, and he and Stan race cross-country to turn in Jeff, who is wanted for smuggling pot into Florida.
Francine insists that Stan and Hayley spend an entire day together, after their arguments drive her crazy, so they can work out their differences about gun control. However, her plan backfires when he takes Hayley to the 'National Gun Association Land', where their conflicting opinions about gun control drive them even further apart. Back home, Roger schemes to get revenge on Steve for eating one of his cookies by convincing him that he's adopted.
Steve becomes a famous author, and the entire family gets caught up in his celebrity, including Stan, who becomes an unbearable 'stage parent'. After Steve hooks up with an agent, he abandons his family to lead a 'Cribs' lifestyle.
As Stan continues to dominate the household, Francine finds herself idolizing a group of women who seem to have it all. She tries to impress them and even lies in order to gain acceptance into their group, until she realizes they arent as perfect as they seem. Meanwhile, loyalties are tested when Stan gets a new best friend.
After Stan and Roger have a rough day, they get into a fight that leads to a Freaky Friday-type switcheroo where they get a taste of life in each other's shoes. But after the excitement of a new life stales, they face each other's problems as Roger is under pressure at work and Stan yearns to be needed. The swap gets out of hand as the family starts to crumble.
After receiving a hefty bonus from work, Stan buys extravagant gadgets while Francine pleads for her dream kiosk. Upset about his lack of support, Francine opens a muffin shop without his approval and gives Stan a taste of life without a housewife. In a desperate move, Stan puts Klaus' brain back into a human body only to discover it was a huge mistake as Klaus tries to win over Francine. Meanwhile, Steve is convinced he's a teen wolf after watching a horror film.
Because of a past incident at his own prom, where he was lured into a dance with the homecoming queen only to have a pile of pigs dropped on him, Stan wants revenge by showing off that he married a homecoming queen, Francine. A proud Stan accompanies Francine to her reunion, but when they find out that two ballots were lost and that Francine didnt actually win the crown, Stan is devastated. Meanwhile, a dejected Steve is 'saved' by a pizza delivery man with a Messianic message.
When Stan goes to Atlantic City for a bachelor party and is shunned by his so-called best friend, Roger steps in and becomes Stan's new sidekick. Their friendship goes to a whole new level, but when they return home and face Francine, Stan realizes that what happens in Atlantic City doesn't necessarily stay there. Meanwhile, Hayley and Steve team up to break up a good-looking couple.
Stan wants Steve to be popular and goes to desperate measures giving him steroids to make him bigger, better, and part of the in-crowd at school. But when the steroids have an unexpected side effect, Steve gets a lot more attention than anyone expected. Meanwhile, after Hayley makes a movie about Francine's life as a housewife, Francine is determined to start a new career as a doctor.
After Steve shows a lack of interest in Stan's job, Stan replaces him with Barry, Steve's malicious friend. Barry frames Steve to eliminate him from the household, but when Steve discovers Barry's weakness, he relies on his CIA skills to save the family. Meanwhile, Roger takes an impressive keg-stand and uses it to become a fraternity brother.
When Francine's birthday brings back haunting memories of a celebrity film moment stolen by George Clooney, Francine's new dream is to destroy the star. But when she tries to win Clooney's heart with the intention of breaking it, Stan actually falls for him and sabotages the plan. Meanwhile, back at home, Roger builds a vineyard and starts up a private sweat shop of foster children.
Stan Smith uses his CIA skills to help 13-year-old son Steve win class president and the heart of the hottest girl in class, Lisa Silver. But when being class president makes Steve mad with power, Stan must jump in to save the day. Meanwhile, Roger, the alien Stan saved from Area 51, helps 18-year-old Hayley with her school paper. In return, she hooks him up with boatloads of junk food to curb his sweet tooth. Unfortunately, some Chocodiles send him over the edge and a sugar crash prohibits him from finishing one of her papers, forcing Hayley to pick up the pieces. And Klaus, the goldfish with the brain of a German guy, pines after mother Francine....
Stan Smith is mad because after getting his wife a job (or 'hobby') as a Real Estate agent, she makes more money than him. In the meantime, his daughter Hayley ran a program that helped the homeless, and Stan's son Steve had an idea to have a Bum Fight program. To get back and to try to gain more money than his wife, Stan takes Steve's idea and starts a Bum Fight Night where he takes bets and treats the homeless like wrestlers. But with the homeless petition, Stan has to end up fighting like a homeless man himself.
Hayley comes home from a Green Party rally with her hair dyed green, instigating a fight with Stan. While she's sleeping, Stan cuts her hair (for her own good, of course). After learning of what Stan did, a wigged Hayley defies her father yet again by moving into the van of her new boyfriend. When Stan cuts her off financially, she gets a job as a waitress in a strip club, which pushes Stan right off the edge. Meanwhile, Steve tries to pass Roger off as his disfigured sister in order to cop a feel with a female classmate.
When Stan forgets his anniversary, he arranges to have 20 hours of Francine's memory erased, but the CIA temp on duty accidentally erases 20 years. Francine, having reverted to her wild child days, moves into her old apartment with Hayley as a roommate, and ends up going to a festival with Hayley's boyfriend. Meanwhile, Steve asks a good-looking girl out, but needs his wingman, Roger, to 'jump on a grenade' for him and date her ugly cousin.
Stan invites his boss over for dinner, but the Smith family fears getting caught hiding Roger. After a close-call, Roger goes into a coma, making everyone thinking he's dead. After the family disposes of his body, Roger tries to get back home, but he ends up in another risky situation with the CIA.
Francine decides to throw a block party to get in touch with the neighborhood. Stan learns his new neighbors are Iranian and immediately suspects that they are terrorists. To prepare Steve for living near terrorists, Stan makes Steve join a group of scouts, who turn out to be trouble makers. Roger is convinced he possesses hidden alien powers and is determined to find out what they are.
Stan goes to great lengths to compete against his rival, Chuck White, and become the new deacon of their church. Meanwhile, Steve is falling in love with Chuck's daughter, Betsy. Roger is going through his reproductive cycle, causing him to lactate, ultimately complicating matters for Stan and Steve.
When Stan is up for a promotion, he asks his family to be on their best behavior at the CIA picnic. Unfortunately, Hayley ends up getting into a fight with Stan's boss, Bullock, which makes Stan think his chances for the promotion are ruined. But when Stan goes to Bullock's house to apologize for Hayley's behavior, he's shocked to discover Bullock's new woman.
When Steve brings home a permission slip to take sex ed at school, Stan flips out and demands to teach it himself. However, after Stan unrealistically explains the birds and the bees to Steve, he gets into an accident that causes him to take matters into his own hands. Meanwhile, Roger becomes a bartender in hopes of making something of himself.
When the CIA organizes a father-son baseball game, Stan is determined to show his co-workers that his son is masculine and athletic. Unfortunately, Steve is a geek, so Stan decides to lie and ditches him. But after getting a taste of his own treatment at work, Stan turns to Steve and his sci-fi knowledge to help capture a cyber-terrorist. Meanwhile, Roger goes incognito in a desperate attempt to interact with humans.
When Stan's father passes away, Stan reveals his real father is actually Jack Smith, a super suave spy. Jack convinces Stan to quit the CIA and work with him at the Scarlet Alliance, an ultra-secret spy group. Francine is upset with Stan, who is busy training with Jack for a mission involving uranium, artwork and terrorists. But when the FBI shows up at the Smiths' house looking for an international jewel thief, Francine suspects Jack is the fake.
Stan has to throw a party for his boss and assumes his wife Francine will do all the work, but she refuses. With Stan as party planner, the event turns into a disaster. As a result, Stans boss relocates Stan and his family to Saudi Arabia, where they quickly get a taste of life on foreign ground. As American and Arabian social norms clash, gender wars heat up.
As the Smiths continue to live in Saudi Arabia, Stan is fully enjoying the male-dominated society, while the rest of the family struggles with the different social norms. Meanwhile, Francines musical exposé on gender roles gets her into trouble, and a brush with death leads the Smiths to return to the United States.
